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Once Upon a Time, an Interactive Adventure

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Post by Wonko the Sane Wed May 25, 2011 11:23 pm

Once upon a time, in a:

a) land far, far away (if you're a mouse)...
b) cubicle adjacent to the one you're sitting in right now...
c) world dominated by giant man-eating sunflowers...
d) time when men were real men, women were real women, and small furry creatures from alpha centauri were small furry creatures from alpha centauri...
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Post by blivvy Thu May 26, 2011 5:22 am

I choose...

C!

Giant man-eating sunflowers are the way to go Very Happy
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Post by Wonko the Sane Thu May 26, 2011 1:33 pm

No poll!! And since E was not an option...

blivvy wrote:I choose...

C!

Giant man-eating sunflowers are the way to go Very Happy

Once upon a time, in a world dominated by giant man-eating sunflowers, there lived a poor paltry purple pony who loved to pompously pounce pole to pole. He got eaten by one of those giant man-eating sunflowers. His friends:

a) an ant and a peacock...
b) Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe and willy-nilly-bo-billy...
c) a tube of chapstick and a bowl of pudding...
d) a talking rock and a thinking chair...
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Post by Loki Thu May 26, 2011 1:56 pm

Boring.
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Post by blivvy Thu May 26, 2011 2:02 pm

Don't spoil the fun loki lol. Kay sum1 else choose the next part.
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Post by Wonko the Sane Thu May 26, 2011 2:20 pm

There will be plenty of story for someone else to choose. Whichever option is chosen by more people by the time I re-check this thread is the one I pick. Or whichever gets chosen first if everyone wants a different option. So gogogogo!
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Post by Theicecreaman Thu May 26, 2011 2:56 pm

b.

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Post by Wonko the Sane Thu May 26, 2011 3:19 pm

Theicecreaman wrote:b.


His friends, Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe and willy-nilly-bo-billy set out on the adventure of a lifetime to obtain the golden arc of weed-b-gone to kill the giant man-and-pony-eating sunflowers of death. Boldly, they left their small village in search of the three clues which would lead them to the greenhouse of destiny! All they had to begin their quest was:

a) a slightly soiled, apricot-scented corner torn from their friend's shirt.
b) a roll of duct tape, some WD-40, a tube of super glue, and a ziplock bag full of trail mix.
c) a hand-drawn map left behind by their purple pony friend.
d) their wits, or lack thereof.
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Post by Wonko the Sane Thu May 26, 2011 7:05 pm

What, still too boring for you Loki?! Fine, I'll add an option:

OR

e) Loki, who also had one of the previous options with him (choose one).
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Post by Theicecreaman Fri May 27, 2011 2:40 pm

blivvy wrote:Kay sum1 else choose the next part.

GOOOO FOOOOLLLLSSS Cat Fight
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Post by Mr.Fjord Fri May 27, 2011 4:28 pm

B. You can never go wrong with Duct tape.
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Post by Wonko the Sane Fri May 27, 2011 5:13 pm

Mr.Fjord wrote:B. You can never go wrong with Duct tape.

All they had to begin their quest was a roll of duct tape, some WD-40, a tube of super glue, and a ziplock bag full of trail mix. Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe and willy-nilly-bo-billy marched for five long hours in the searing heat of of the mid-day sun. As they approached their first challenge, an ancient canyon carved by glaciers fifty million years ago, they stopped to rest and plan their next move. Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe scouted the area and discovered an old bridge guarded by a strange bearded man. He returned to willy-nilly-bo-billy to discover an empty ziplock bag lying in a circle of crumbs on the ground.

"You ate our only food already?!" Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe shouted. "Did you at least save me any?!"

Willy-nilly-bo-billy avoided eye contact and fumbled through their bag of supplies. In a fit of rage, Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe grabbed their roll of duct tape and duct taped willy-nilly-bo-billy to a rock. Hanging over the edge of the canyon. Face down.

Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe set up camp for the night, leaving his companion there overnight. In the morning, they both continued on to the bridge hoping the strange bearded man would give them the first of three clues that would lead them to the Greenhouse of Destiny containing the Golden Arc of Weed-B-Gone!

As they approached the strange man, he extended a hand signaling them to halt. He cleared his throat and slowly gazed upwards at them. His eyes were black as midnight as he said:

a) "He who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three ere the other side he see..."
b) "Pardon me, but do you have any Grey Poupon?"
c) "None shall pass!"
d) "...I have to pee."
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Post by blivvy Fri May 27, 2011 5:46 pm

A mysterious dark stranger eh? Well then, it has to be choice A.
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Post by Wonko the Sane Fri May 27, 2011 6:14 pm

blivvy wrote:A mysterious dark stranger eh? Well then, it has to be choice A.

As they approached the strange man, he extended a hand signaling them to halt. He cleared his throat and slowly gazed upwards at them. His eyes were black as midnight as he said "He who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three ere the other side he see."

Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe shoved Willy-nilly-bo-billy towards the strange bearded man.

Piercing words came from beneath the strange man's beard, directed towards Willy-nilly-bo-billy. "What is your name?" he asked.

Willy-nilly-bo-billy scratched his head and stared at the man. "Uuhhhh... Willeh nilleh bo billeh" he said. "But mah frends call meh Willeh for short."

The man's eyes remained focused on him, his expression flat as roadkill that's been rotting on the side of the highway for seven days. "What is your quest?" he asked again.

"Uhhhhhhhmmmmmmmuh.. sumtin' 'bout a golden sumtin' or other? I honest dun really know, I jest go wher Billy go." He managed to respond.

"What is your favorite color?" the man asked.

"I liek teh bluez!!" Willy-nilly-bo-billy shouted with glee.

With that, the man's demeanor instantly relaxed and he moved aside. "Very well, you may pass."

Willy-nilly-bo-billy hopped across the rickity old bridge shouting back "Come on Billy! It's safe as can be!!" As Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe approached the old mysterious bearded man for his turn, he accidentally gazed into his black as midnight eyes and fell into a trance. The canyon stretched out in front of him to infinity, his companion's shouts echoed in his head until they faded to nothing and soon Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe found himself surrounded by the Great Infinite Black, the domain of the giant man-eating sunflowers.

He felt very dizzy, but could not fall for he had no body, there was just black. Then, through the darkness, came a piercing voice: "If you are to succeed on your quest, beware the:

a) "...Red Masked Maniac from Mansfield Hollow!"
b) "...four false Golden Arcs of Weed-B-Gone!"
c) "...treacherous seas that lie beyond, for therein swim beautiful Sirens of Destiny!"
d) "...Jabberwock!"
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Post by Wonko the Sane Wed Jun 01, 2011 1:28 am

...??


That's it, each time you people visit the forum and don't choose an option in the adventure, you're gonna lose points!! Angry Wife
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Post by blivvy Wed Jun 01, 2011 5:47 am

D!
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Post by Theicecreaman Wed Jun 01, 2011 6:00 pm

haha damn i didn't choose since it would be somebody else's turn Very Happy

Willy sounds much like our resident Llama Cat Fight
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Post by Wonko the Sane Wed Jun 01, 2011 11:01 pm

Doesn't matter if it's somebody else's turn or not. If there's multiple votes, the most popular choice wins. I would have kept the poll in the thread except that I'd have to delete and re-add it each time there's new options and that's too much of a pain to do.
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Post by Wonko the Sane Wed Jun 01, 2011 11:18 pm

He felt very dizzy, but could not fall for he had no body, there was just black. Then, through the darkness, came a piercing voice: "If you are to succeed on your quest, beware the Jabberwock!!" it cautioned.

Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe attempted to scream for help, but there was no sound. He tried to run, but there was no space. He thought about waiting it out, but there was no sense of time either! Then, a horrific thumping sound came out from the Great Infinite Black and Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe saw two circular flames charging him, the eyes of the fierce Jabberwocky! Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe could do nothing as the beast screeched and its mighty jaws descended upon him!

"Billeh!!" Shouted Willy-nilly-bo-billy. "billEEEEHH!!!" He shook Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe awake.

"It was awful!!" Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe said, panting. "The Jabberwock nearly got me!"

"Jabbuhwhuh?" questioned Willy-nilly-bo-billy. "Listen, Billeh, we ain't got no time fo' your silliness right? We gots us one o' dem' der' missions right?"

Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe tried to focus. "Uh, yeah, the quest, right..." He stood up, now on the other side of the bridge and canyon with Willy-nilly-bo-billy. "That must be our first clue, 'Beware the Jabberwock'".

"Jabbuhwhuh?" questioned Willy-nilly-bo-billy again.

"Nevermind." responded Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe.

He shook off the vision and they began to move forward in search of their second clue to the location of the Greenhouse of Destiny, containing the Gold Arc of Weed-B-Gone that would save their people! They both focused their gaze forward at the second challenge spread out before them, the:

a) Magnificent Mountains of Mischief!
b) Auspicious Outhouse of the Awesome Ape!
c) Salty Seas of the Seven Sexy Sirens!
d) The Torturous Tides of Tomorrow!
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Post by Theicecreaman Thu Jun 02, 2011 3:00 pm

C.

btw you have kickass storytelling skills man haha

You programmers sure know how to write! rofl
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Post by blivvy Thu Jun 02, 2011 3:52 pm

You're gonna publish this story when it's finished right wonko?
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Post by Wonko the Sane Thu Jun 02, 2011 5:45 pm

Theicecreaman wrote:btw you have kickass storytelling skills man haha

You programmers sure know how to write! rofl

Sherlock


blivvy wrote:You're gonna publish this story when it's finished right wonko?

It is being published! Right here. Though I should probably move the whole thing into the Epic Legends of Cake forum, huh.
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Post by Wonko the Sane Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:20 pm

Theicecreaman wrote:C.

He shook off the vision and they began to move forward in search of their second clue to the location of the Greenhouse of Destiny, containing the Golden Arc of Weed-B-Gone that would save their people! They both focused their gaze forward at the second challenge spread out before them, the Salty Seas of the Seven Sexy Sirens!

"Uhhhhh... Billeh?"

"Yes?"

"I think I sees a mermaid out ther."

"Ugh." sighed Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe. "Come on, I see a boat down there, let's go."

The two headed down towards the beach and the launched a small, old boat with only one oar into the water. It had a giant hole in the bottom, but the seas were so salty the boat seemed to hover over the surface of the water.

"Look Billeh!!" Willy-nilly-bo-billy stood up, pointing out towards a small island, rocking the boat severely to one side.

"SIT DOWN!!" Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe scolded. Willy-nilly-bo-billy obliged.

They began taking turns paddling their one oar towards the island. The small boat was lifted and dropped by the waves, rocked to and fro. Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe was re-introduced to his lunch. And then again.

"Yuh know, I wusn't talkin' 'bout the eyeland" mumbled Willy-nilly-bo-billy.

Just then, a shimmering mermaid leapt into the center of their small boat, and four more surfaced surrounding it. The four beauties outside the boat began to hum a harmonious tune, to which the first mermaid sang in the most lovely voice either of them had ever heard. She sat close to Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe, pressing her half-naked body against his as she sang to him.

Willy-nilly-bo-billy ran a curious finger down the mermaid's bare back. "Ewww, she's all slimeh, Billeh!!" He exclaimed, wiping his finger on the side of the boat.

But Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe didn't seem to hear him. His eyes were locked on the gorgeous mermaid singing a lullaby to him.

"Billeh, c'mon let's go!! They're so slimeh!!!" Willy-nilly-bo-billy stood up and tried to get around the mermaid to Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe, but the mermaid slapped him with her tail. He fell overboard. While trying to get back in the boat, and while being slapped by the four other singing mermaids, Willy-nilly-bo-billy tipped the boat upside down, throwing the mermaid and Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe into the water as well.

"billeEEEHHHHHHH!!!" He began to panic. The mermaids were closing in, their tales slapping him with even greater fury while their voices never missed a beat. Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe was floating on his back, blissfully ignorant to it all, while the first mermaid began to float him away from the island they were headed towards.

"No Billeh!! Bad murmaid bad bad!!" shouted Willy-nilly-bo-billy in vain. He grabbed Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe and began to swim away from the five singing mermaids, when two more mermaids appeared in their path. But these two weren't like the others, they had bulging bug eyes, giant buck teeth and grimey green hair with seaweed flakes in it for added greenness. Willy-nilly-bo-billy was love struck.

The two new mermaids fondled Willy-nilly-bo-billy. Billy-bob-joe-bob-joe continued floating on his back while the others sang softly to him. They were both completely helpless and at the mercy of these seven mermaid sirens! Their quest to save their people faded from their minds. But then, swooping down from above, riding on the talons of a mutant seagull to save the day came:

a) Loki the Mouse! "En garde, thou foul beasts!" He cried, as he stabbed at the mermaids with his cutlass.
b) Icecreaman the Perverted! "Hey sexy bebehs, come ride with me" he slyly suggested.
c) 'Blivvy the Badass! "DIE BASTARDS!!!! AAAHHH!!" he screamed as he went all rambo on the mermaid's asses.
d) Fjord the Average! "Oh, look Frank, a couple of helpless hillbillies drowning in a sea of sexy sirens" he observed casually.
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Post by blivvy Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:27 pm

Well obviously choice C
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Post by Theicecreaman Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:33 pm

B. obviously.
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